😹 If you don’t feel comfortable spending money…

A while ago, I held a finance workshop for writers in New York. Most everyone in the room talked about how they wished they spent less, except Darren, seated in the back.

“I don’t have a money problem. I never spend it.”

At the same time, Darren was crushing his pad of paper as if he was hoping to get juice from it.

I meet a lot of folks like Darren who have money, but feel terrible using it.

Darren wasn't able to enjoy a nice dinner out, frame his art, or go on a big trip to Spain, even though he has the money. Interestingly, he felt that can spend money on others without issue, but he doesn’t know how to spend it for himself. 

I asked him, "What is the money for?"

“The money is for saving.”

Saving money is great! I say that all the time in this newsletter. But building savings can also lead to paralysis. Holding the money feels so right, and thus most spending seems wasteful. So how do I help Darren feel comfortable spending money?

We dug in deep and learned why he was saving the money:

“I may lose my job one day. It’s happened before.”
“My folks are getting older, and I don’t know, but I worry they don't have enough money.”
“I live in an old house, and the plumbing is always breaking.”

We then sat down and defined how much he needed to save for all those very real situations.

He finally saw, written on paper, that he had enough money for those stressful emergencies. He could breathe. He could relax and get that art framed, and know his parents would be okay.